Wednesday, March 16, 2011

M.U.S.I.C.

I, Love. Music.

“Welcome to my silly life 
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood 
Miss 'No way, it's all good', it didn't slow me down 
Mistaken, always second guessing, underestimated 
Look, I'm still around”
Even though most people already know just how much I love music, I thought it wouldn’t hurt to once again express my infatuation with it.

Music has gotten me through a LOT of hard times, and at times I have thought that nothing was there and real except for music. I have been crazy with music, I have been sad with music, I have been happy with music, music has expressed my every emotion. In fact, whats that song? Music is my boyfriend- The Ting Tings. Yeah, that’s how I feel. Felt. Not only do I thoroughly enjoy music, it has become part of me. Its how I live. I express myself through my music, it calms me when I am too mad to talk to anybody, it is there for me when  it seems I have just made the BIGGEST mistake of my life and I don’t want to do anything. I have been utterly sad and felt just wretched at times, and music is always there for me, expressing the same thing I am feeling, except in words I could never make flow.

I am in awe of music, it amazes me. It will always be a part of me, in every way and shape and form.

Music has become a part of me in a way that I completely understand when somebody says music is their life, even when they aren’t a musician. Music can speak to people in different ways to everybody and that is something I admire about it. 

Sunday, March 6, 2011

We Move Along

SOMETHING that I love about Life- We Move Along. No matter where we are in life, no matter how happy or sad we are, we will all move along, we all grow up and grow older  and the days and minutes go by and ….we move along! Nothing is permanent, nothing is meant to last, and nothing is guaranteed forever because, we can change the future because the future hasn't happened yet! This may seem like a very depressing realization, but in fact, its comforting to me. No matter how sad or upset or distraught I am, or even stressed out and pulling my hair out, I am going to move along. In all of eternity I probably will not remember that exact moment and so whats the point of stressing out about it?

In fact, I have this written on my mirror in my dorm , and I look at it whenever I feel distraught or feel like Im stuck in a moment, and I always tell myself this wont last! It cant last! Its impossible for a certain moment to drag on and on and on for forever, because that’s the awesome way this world was made and therefore I am going to move along and tomorrow will come and I will be okay in the END.
 "All you gotta keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know ya do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along  move along just to make it through

When everything is wrong
We move along
Wipe back what is wrong
We Move Along"

Monday, February 28, 2011

SO introduction to my theories

I like to look at my mind as a mush of great muddled ideas that I never really finish because, well, I rarely finish a thought. 
Awesome thing about me. :D
Its always intersting to have a deep discussion with me...you should try it sometime. 
Youll be amused I guarantee it. =]
BUT, amidst my muddle of  puddles, I have pondered on a certain question- What is the answer to the question of life? I kno, huge random question, right?  Well, details, details.

Lets move on.

So, our human nature is to do everything secular, right? And the Bible, at least the gist of what I've gotten of it from what Ive been told and what parts Ive actuaaalllyyy read ( I KNOW shocker..) we are supposed to go against every aspect of our basic human nature. So, I think that God wants to see just how many people can go against their basic human nature and serve Him and well, basically prove to Him just how dedicated to Him we each are.

Of course, not all of us can go to Nigeria and build a church and feed the homeless and  such. At least, I don't plan to. Not that I don't hope every single child should totally have dinner tonight, I just have homework. And like, a Psychology degree. Well, in four years.

But anyways, where was I...ah, yes. there are different levels. Some of us simply pray to Him every so often, and try at times to not cuss and send a bird to everybody that makes us mad. That's the point I've been at for a very long time. I have always wanted to try new things, and some new things aren't necessarily the Godliest things ever, so I haven't wanted to go all the way and read my Bible every day and actually WANT to serve Him. Somewhere in the Bible doesn't it say that in order to find Him we have to seek Him? Well, lets just say I wasn't 'seeking' Him. I was just having a short little convo with Him when I hadn't slept in 24 hours and had to make a good grade on a test. That, FYI, isn't seeking Him. Case any of you are at that point. Of which I really hope you aren't. But you can be and I wont judge you because I pride myself on my open-mindedness and try by best to  not judge which IS going against my human nature and I have done this my whole life- well, at least in the past about...Five? years. Butttttttt, I went off a rabbit trail there.

Yes. There are people who talk to Him every day and want to serve Him and they go to church all the time and might sometimes go to Devos somewhere and say no to bad things like drugs and drinking and illegal things because they want a good rep and have a part of them that they want God to be proud of them and so this is what they do.

So, as you can see, there are people who gradually climb up this so called 'ladder' of 'want' and I, personally, believe God wants to see just how willing we are to serve Him. Why did he create us? To see how much self discipline each of us can muster? But wouldn't he kind of know? Since he kind of created us?

I had a pretty intense discussion with one of the girls on the floor about allll of this and some really  new viewpoints were brought to my attention- Most credited to a certain Jessica Harper. :)

In my Psychology class, I am learning how our perceptions of reality are based on how our mind processes our experiences- If we are cold and walk outside into 100 degrees, we are going to be relieved. But if we are extremely hot and have just worked out, then stepping into 100 degree weather is the lassstttt thing we ever want to do. So, of course this extends into different areas- our whole perspective of life- but that is a whole aspect I could go on and on with.

YES I'm very aware this blog is completely random, But I think that I will make a series, which will be, basically, explaining this one. Because I sat down to explain one aspect of my thinking and well, went into a whole bunch and I don't really wanna erase all that I wrote all up there because there is a high chance I will forget it all. Plus I haven't slept in a long time and have had lots and lots of coffee so there's an excuse to have a completely random blog! Plus I was just in Psychology class and, I'm not quite sure if you have any idea how thought-provoking a psych class is...but I'm sure you can imagine.

But, thats all for now. I must go study my Spanish vocab words if  I hope to pass. And get more coffee. yay.

Friday, February 25, 2011

Life Online?

So, Ive never actually really kept a blog before but I was suddenly inspired to make a blog because it suddenly seemed like the coolest thing when I saw a commercial for Google Technology on Hulu...speaking of, I haven't finished my episode of Castle yet...
But, moving on. I really do want to keep a blog because I have noticed, as I go through my life I want to record my thoughts but it always takes too long to write everything down, and I haven't had my own computer for too long. SO, since I no longer have an excuse, here I am. 
I cant guarantee Ill post regularly but I certainly will try and I have no idea what kind of blogs I will post. Guess we'll all be surprised! And thats always fun. Also, I am not an English major. So I cant guarantee perfection in my grammar....